El Presidente is dead, long live El Presidente

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Tue, 17/04/2018 - 20:46

Michael Roylance has succeeded Andy Simpson as El Presidente of Big Foot in a peaceful transition. In his new role as Absolute Tyrant we can look forward to the e-bike class at MTBO going on to better things, together with a division for killer robots in Metro League.

Formerly president of Mountain Devils 2nd in their final year, Michael will bring his can-do mentality and enthusiasm to a role where his predecessor seemed to have run out of both.

Former PM, John Howard, who stood against Michael at the 1993 Federal election, was unavailable for comment but is believed to be hanging out for Big Foot to develop a shell suit to add to his walking wardrobe.

Simpson won't be remembered for his grandiose plans, only some of which came to fruition:

  • Replacing the SSS with a series of 10 man over-night orienteering relays
  • Eliminating the cursed crappy plastic sleeve as a map covering device
  • Inserting the right to disqualify whingers into the sign-up copperplate in Eventor
  • Inserting a wifi device into SI units that allowed him to remotely disable or enable them at will to make the end of chasing start events funnier.